What to Wear to Your Lesbian Wedding

Once engaged to another lady, the first question that seems to come up from others is the following:

"Are you both wearing dresses??"

For some, the thought of being dressed in a frilly gown and paraded in front of everyone they know is simply not ever going to be a reality. Many of you would much rather get a swanky pants suit or some dapper vest/suit combo, wear some Chucks and stay comfortable. However, regardless of whether you're a pants lady or a dress lady, you still have to figure out what exactly you're going to wear to your own wedding. You also have to figure out what your bride-to-be is going to wear so that you can stand in front of everyone and loving glances and heart felt vows aside, look like you were made to be with one another.

The best way to do this is to go with a matching color scheme. This color scheme can be present in the actual clothing itself, or you can use the bouquet(s) and/or boutonnieres to bring it all together.

A color scheme is a good idea in general anyway, especially if you're a matchy-matchy type. Everything can match; from your clothes and invitations to your decorations.

If you want to stick with the classic white or ivory that's great too. But be careful because there is a wide variety of shades and fabrics considered white or ivory. Try to find the same shade or something close to what your future wife will be wearing. Choose clothing that best fits your personality. Don't worry about matching the style, the simplicity of the color leaves room for variation, and the bouquet(s) can give a nice pop of color.

If you both like the same kind of clothing and fit well into the same style then you'll look very symmetrical up at the altar. 

Or... you can play with opposite colors OR the exact same clothing if you want.

There are many possible combinations out there. Before you really start shopping consider the following: What style(s) flatter my body type? Do those styles fit my personality? How much money can I spend on clothing? What is the weather going to be like during the wedding? Do I need to be able to dance in this outfit?

I am embarrassed to admit how many hours I spent browsing wedding dresses online, but I will tell you that all of the ads on my Facebook page were suddenly wedding oriented. Before you head out to a bridal boutique get a good idea of what you're looking for, and what you may be able to get it for, it will make the whole experience a lot easier.

Another thing that my partner and I did was to go with each other to a David's Bridal just to browse and get an idea of what styles of dresses we liked best on ourselves. A word of warning though; although same sex marriage is becoming more prevalent, the majority of bridal store customers are still straight women and that's what they're used to. So, unless you walk in holding hands be prepared for "oh, you're sisters!" or "best friends getting married on the same day!" or "a joint wedding!" and then also be prepared to explain to the salesperson that you are gay and watch as their face becomes red and paralyzed and they excuse themselves to go and whisper it to all of the other employees in the store. This is a true story, and it happened even after we filled out all the paperwork which clearly stated we were marrying each other.

Once we had a good idea of the styles and color(s) we wanted the serious shopping began. I browsed the used wedding dresses at Once Wed, PreOwned Wedding Dresses, and Recycled Bride. I ordered a few to try on from Bloomingdales and JCrew before settling on a dress I found on eBay for $99. (I can't pass up a good deal). My partner found her dress at a local boutique here in Denver called The Bridal Collection for about $1000, and was happy with her dress and the service she received. We did our actual shopping separately and didn't see each other in our dresses until the day of the wedding, something I highly recommend.